November 10, 2012

Procreate for the Right Reasons


Having kids has never really appealed to me. I just don’t think I’ll ever be able to give up impromptu movie marathons, traveling, or late-night reading. Or sleep. Yeah, I’d like to maintain a healthy relationship with sleep. But it’s been brought to my attention that there are three perfectly legitimate reasons to procreate.

1. Candy: Unfortunately, you can’t get away with trick-or-treating after a certain age. If I had kids, I’d convince them that the Great Pumpkin gobbles up children who don’t share with their parents.



2. Toys: For some reason, when toys show up on my Christmas wish list, my grandmother thinks I’m joking. Anything with a choking hazard, like, say, a Monster High Doll, would be MINE. It’s called being a responsible mom.



3. Playgrounds: Having a kid at a playground is marginally more acceptable than fighting over a swing with someone else’s five-year-old.



It’d be totally worth all the diaper changes and temper tantrums, right?  


3 comments:

  1. No, ma'am, it would definitely not be worth it whatsoever.

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  2. It is TOTALLY worth it! Just ask those of us who played on the swings in the park for hours and didn't get funny looks because we had a child with us -- try that now and people think I'm "special". Or spent hours playing cars in the elaborate dirt cities our children made under the deck -- those were the days! Yes, TOTALLY worth it. - Marline

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  3. Playing on the swings in the park sounds awesome. The crying and the pooping? Not so much. ;)

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