Eavesdropping: Usually Not Worth the Effort

Have you ever noticed that the conversations you try to listen in on end up being the most boring conversations you’ve ever heard? Strangers always have more interesting things to talk about than anyone you know.

Conversation between two people you know:

Kyle: And then I did the dishes.

Jen: Did you empty the dishwasher afterward?

Kyle: Yeah, I did.

Jen: Cool. That was responsible of you.

Conversation between two strangers:

Stranger 1: Actually, Humpback Whales use bubble nets to catch their prey.

Stranger 2: Bubble whats-its?

Stranger 1: Yeah, a group of them will swim upward together to create a barrier of bubbles, so their prey can’t escape.

Stranger 2: Huh.

You: THAT IS SO COOL!

Strangers: [Blank stares]

You: About the whales . . .

Conversation between two people you know:

Ron: You have something green on your chin.

Drew: Oh. Where?

Ron: There.

Drew: Oh. Broccoli from lunch.

Ron: Gross, dude.

Conversation between two strangers:

Stranger 1: Did you hear about Mr. Grinshlap?

Stranger 2: Mmhmm. I heard they found the body.

Stranger 1: No, well. Kind of.

Stranger 2: What do you mean, “kind of?”

Stranger 1: They found it. In pieces.

You: [Staring slack-jawed]

Stranger 2: I bet she did it.

What’s the strangest thing you’ve ever overheard?